Monday, September 12, 2011


Does the Internet Make You Mean?

Let me explain what I mean by the title above.  I am currently enrolled in a graduate studies class titled, “Social Dynamics of Communication and Technology”.  As an assignment, we have been asked to write a reflective blog or essay that is based on some thought-provoking questions posed by the professor.  The above title stems from the following question: Is it your experience that emails tend to be angrier than other forms of communication?

For this essay, I intend to examine email communication – along with several other forms of CMC (Computer Mediated Communication) – to determine if, in fact, our behavior online can be categorized as being more angry that our typical face-to-face (F2F) communication.    

I’ll begin with a personal experience.  I received a statement from a recent visit to a medical office and was caught off-guard by the hefty price on the invoice.  This was not my first visit to this particular practitioner, and the bill was much higher than any other I had previously received.  I had expected the normal cost for a routine visit. 

I spent a few days thinking about what I needed to do to address the issue.  I certainly didn’t want to come across like I was refusing to pay for services rendered; however, I also didn’t feel right about some of the line-items on the invoice.  Consequently, I determined that I would address my invoice questions with an email.  I sent a cordial (yet perturbed) email to the doctor and his office manager, expressing concern regarding the recent account statement.  Fortunately, the exchange went no further than that; both the office manager and the doctor responded that they had reviewed the invoice and provided a new (and much lower) total owed on my account. 

As I reflected on that experience I realized a couple things.  First, although my email was not angry, by any means, it was much more bold than I would have been had I gone in to discuss it F2F.  Second, the reason I was able to express myself with increased boldness was because I didn’t have to be prepared for an immediate backlash, or the embarrassment that could have followed if I had been wrong.  I had no reason to fear such reaction, because I was sitting safely behind my keyboard.

So perhaps my title is a little misleading.  I don’t mean to claim that the internet is making us all a bunch of despicable jerks; rather, I only mean to suggest that our communication online is sometimes more brazen than our typical F2F interactions would be.

Researchers have tried to identify what causes and contributes to this perceived increase of conflict in CMC.  One of the main behaviors contributing to conflict in CMC is flaming:
           
The occurrence of flaming in organizations is linked to a diverse set of triggers, such as the informality of the communication medium, the absence of a buffering ‘‘time lag’’ that might moderate response, and a lack of nonverbal feedback that might moderate and augment the interpretation. Researchers theorize that email encourages uninhibited and aggressive communications because emailers are less influenced by social norms in this environment. (Landry, 2000, p. 139)
           
Another realm in which hostility is often found online is through the comments and postings that regularly accompany web-based news stories.  News outlets have been able to attract a following on their sites by allowing readers to interact with the story and each other.  The commentary provided is often engaging and worthwhile; however, there are an equal amount of comments that are rude, intolerant, vindictive and insensitive.  I am constantly amazed at the lengths to which people will go to express their point, as well as to condemn anyone who thinks otherwise.  Once again, this seems to occur more frequently online because of the courage people feel in the confines of their office or den.  Without fear of immediate physical repercussions, internet users seize the opportunity to unbridle their filter and unleash their textual fury.     
           
Adding to the complexity of this type of language can also be the matter of misinterpretation on the part of the recipient.  Some messages that are not intended to offend sometimes do (and vice-versa). The crux of the problem is this: ‘one person’s “hostile language” is another person’s polite reminder, an attempt at humour, or a poorly worded but well-intended message’. (Thurlow, 2004, p. 72)
              
As I have reflected on my recent email exchange with the doctor’s office and read what scholars have to say about this phenomenon, I have tried to determine if internet use does, in fact, make a person more susceptible to anger.  I believe that it does; however, only with this caveat: the level to which a person will lash-out is commensurate to their typical temperament.  Simply put, people who are laid-back and easy-going will become only slightly more bold with their online interaction; while those who are typically quick to anger and outburst will become even more virulent and incendiary.

Questions For Discussion (please comment below):

  • What are your thoughts on this topic? 
  • How closely does your internet personality mirror your real-life personality?
  • Do you feel like your internet personality is more aggressive and angry?
  • Do you have any personal experiences that illustrate this type of online behavior?
       
References

Landry, E. M. (2000). Scrolling around the new organization: The potential for conflict in the on-line environment. Negotiation Journal, 16(2), 133–142.  


Thurlow, C., Lengel, L., & Tomic, A. (2004). Computer mediated communication: Social interaction and the Internet. London: SAGE.

9 comments:

  1. This is such an interesting post Josh. I definitely think computer mediated communication and I would add text messaging is a definite problem these days. Specifically with youth. People don't know how to communicate FTF as effectively as in days past. Not having someone responding to you instantly allows you to say a lot more whether it is more aggressive or not. It is less like our true selves and how interactions with others naturally are. Thoughts and feelings can be changed and influenced by others' comments, sometimes for the better. FTF seems to be, in my opinion, a healthier, more honest form of communication.
    However, I have had experiences where this worked for my benefit, just like you. There are instances where boldness is required whether to resolve conflict or to reassure and repair. Not having to worry about a person's immediate reaction sometimes allows you to say things you really want them to know without the fear or distraction of their response.

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  2. "...the reason I was able to express myself with increased boldness was because I didn’t have to be prepared for an immediate backlash, or the embarrassment that could have followed if I had been wrong. I had no reason to fear such reaction, because I was sitting safely behind my keyboard...."

    This is a very astute observation, and it makes me think of how this feeling/reaction is not just confined to online communications. When I think of how people act when they are in their cars (think "road rage"), I think it's for similar reasons: They are safe behind their steering wheels in their cars, and since people assume the other driver is a stranger who they won't see again, it's easy to have no accountability or consequences for angry behavior. If we aren't held responsible for our statements or behavior, then we are free to express anger or frustration that we would otherwise keep in check.

    Thanks for the thoughtful post!

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  4. I would agree that I am definitely bolder via email than face to face communication. I think it's for the simple fact that I don't suffer immediate consequences or embarrassment if I offend somebody, unintentionally or not. I consider myself to be a pretty easy-going person and I can admit that the internet has definitely made me meaner.

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  5. Do you think it's made you meaner, or just more honest? I find that even if I'm anonymous or if I'm using email, I still try to be polite and use the same manners as I would F2F, and I make a point to hold other people accountable for rude behavior. My sister isn't speaking to me at the moment because I am holding her and her husband responsible for some "flame" emails they sent out to family members, so even though the response was delayed over days rather than seconds, there are still consequences for mean behavior. And part of those consequences are she has unfriended me on Facebook, so our relationship has suffered.

    But were you mean, or simply honest? Honesty I think is a good thing and can be used effectively. You described your letter as cordial and it sounds like you received a positive outcome, so it doesn't sound like you were mean.

    I have a feeling that over time, society will develop an underlying code for acceptable behavior online. "Trolls" are called out and banned from conversations, and generally communities tend to self-regulate offenders.

    Vanessa

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  6. Well done Josh! I thought about tackling this issue, but stuck with love & the internet. I have definitely had experiences with the internet causing hostile reactions and misunderstood communications. I had an ex-boyfriend that was constantly angered at my responses on Instant Message (IM) despite the fact that I never meant any harm. After dating for a year, we decided that we would no longer IM, and if we absolutely HAD to, we would preface our it with "I come in peace."

    My parents aren't very computer savvy, so they often write email in CAPS which looks like THEY ARE SHOUTING AT YOU. They aren't great writers to begin with, so sending emails without proofreading or checking to see that they aren't being rude doesn't account for great communication in the family. The fact that they don't understand how to read humor online doesn't help either...

    I work for the government, so I have to be particularly careful of what I say and how I say it. There have been a few times that I've read something and thought, "are they shouting at me?" and sometimes the answer is yes, that particular jerk would've been just as rude f2f as they were in cmc. So, I've gotten better at expressing myself in emails, and in my responses. I now demand just as much respect online as I do in person. I think it's fair :)

    Great work, Josh. I think your information was presented well and I was able to easily understand and follow your point. Wonderful writing!

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  7. Great article Josh! The joys of grad school and creative thinking assignments. First of all, let me comment on your backdrop which fits so appropriately with your title. As a communications major I recognize these types of things. :) I will agree with you on the idea that people can be more bold in email or chat than in F2F communication. It is interesting how an introverted person is timid and shy in person, but will open right up and communicate via chat or email. Boldness does come out using the keyboard and internet. Thanks for a great writeup on this topic and best of wishes on your graduate studies!

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  8. Great article, Josh! Really interesting.

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  9. Hey everyone! Thanks for your feedback on the article. Just so you know, I have moved this blog over to wordpress, so there won't be any more updates to this blog. Here is the new link (along with a new posting, hot off the press:

    http://woodshedrant.wordpress.com/

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